Gaara the Zombie
by TeenageNeko
Summary: Naruto, Sakura and Kakashi visit Suna to drop some medicine off and make sure that Gaara is doing well after having Shukaku removed. They find that the Kazekage is no longer human. Semi-Crackfic. OneShot.


**Enjoy an Review!**

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Naruto marched to Suna with Sakura and Kakashi following him. Team seven had volunteered to drop some medical supplies off (Kakashi only said yes because of Naruto).

It had been a long day and the ninja's couldn't wait for dinner and of corse, a shower.

Temari and Kankuro met them at the gate and happily escorted them to the Kazekage tower. They were almost there when Kankuro pulled Naruto aside.

"Listen," whispered the puppeteer, "Gaara's a little different then when you last saw him."

Naruto nodded with a sad look on his face. "It's because he's not a Jinchuriki anymore isn't it?"

"Actually, no."

Naruto gasped, "What could've possibly changed? Did he dye his hair? Is he," Naruto looked around, then leaned closer, "gay?"

Kankuro held a hand up as a signal to tell Naruto to stop. "No, he is not gay."

Naruto slumped against the wall with a sigh. "Will you just tell me already?"

"Well, there was a little, what's the word?, tweak in the Jutsu and-"

Naruto stood up straight and gave Kankuro a strange look with wide eyes and a slightly open mouth. "Tweak? Whats that tweak?"

Kankuro sweat dropped. "Errrr..........I'll tell you, but only if you look normal."

"Normal, got it!"

"The tweak brought him back to life, but he really doesn't have much in him."

Naruto tilted his head, "Huh?"

"Look," Kankuro grabbed Naruto's sleeve and ran to catch up with the others, "you'll find out for yourself."

At the Kage tower..........

Temari nodded on the door.

"Gaara," she called softly, "may we come in?"

Everyone inched closer to the door, even Kakashi.

A low groan came in replay.

"Gaaaaaaaaaaaaagh."

Temari nodded and turned the knob. "That's a yes."

The moment the door was all the way open, everyone dashed in. Nothing could have been more awkward.

Gaara was sitting at his desk looking at paperwork. He was wearing his Kage robes and , to Naruto's relief, he hadn't dyed his hair. But, he was different.

Sakura leaned closer and gasped. She scooted over to Naruto and whispered, "I'm not seeing things am I?"

Naruto gulped, "Nope. I see it."

They both looked at Kakashi.

The copy nin shrugged; a surprised look in his eye.

They stood there for a minute, then three, then five. After seven minutes had gone by, Kankuro walked over tapped his brother on the shoulder.

Gaara looked up; he saw Kankuro and gave himself a face-palm.

"Sorry." He muttered, "I forgot that you all were here."  
Naruto was the first to speak. "Uh, it's okay."

What had changed was the Kazekage himself. His eyes were unblinking and unfocused-the irises were so wide that they nearly covered his entire sclera's, his skin was even paler than Orochimaru (yeah, that's possible), and his teeth seemed a bit sharper.

Naruto fought back the urge to vomit; not only was the atmosphere unpleasant, but it also smelled like something had died.

They all stood in silence, except for Gaara-who was sitting down.

Kankuro motioned for him to stand up and greet the Konoha ninjas.

Gaara nodded and slowly lifted himself up.

*crack*

Naruto winced at the cracking sound.

That's when something strange happened, Gaara got stuck in the middle of trying to stand. He was hunched over and looked very uncomfortable.

Temari and Kankuro walked over to Gaara and tried to get him unstuck. All three siblings looked embarrassed.

Sakura padded over to offer her help.

Naruto leaned over to Kakashi. "Hey Sensei," he whispered, "whats wrong with Gaara?"

The older ninja tapped his chin. "Hmmm. I'm not sure."

*snap*

The ninjas looked up and, to their horror, saw a bone producing from Gaara's back.

Sakura staggered back.

"W-what happened to him!" she screamed.

Temari scratched her head, "Well-" she was cut off by Gaara.

"Look," he said, "we'll explain once this bone goes back into place." He looked at Sakura. "Some medical Ninjutsu should fix it."

Naruto didn't know what was weirder. The fact that Gaara looked just about dead or the fact that Gaara had a bone sticking out of his back and he treating it like it was nothing.

Sakura trudged over to the Kazekage and placed a hand over his back. The soft green glow surrounded her hand and indicated that the redhead's wound was fixable. After a minute had passed, the bone began to scoot back into place.

Sakura had expected blood to come pouring out, not even a single drop left the Kage's body, but he was obviously in pain.

"Gaaaaaaaaaaaaagh! Gaaaaa!" he half roared half groaned.

When she was finished, no trance of the wound remained. She walked back over to Naruto and Kakashi and crossed her arms under her chest.

Gaara stood all the way up, then slouched down.

"Thank you." He said, "I didn't want to have anything else stitched up."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow. "Anything else?"

Gaara reached down and pulled his sleeve up. His entire arm looked like it was being held together with stitches.

Naruto winced.

Sakura gasped.

Kakashi went wide-eyed.

"You see," Gaara said, "I'm a bit........." his voice trailed off and he rolled the sleeve back down. "Never mind."

Naruto growled, "What are you? Kankuro told me that there was a tweak in the Jutsu Granny Chiyo used to bring you back, what was that tweak? Most importantly, what did it do to you?"

Gaara, despite all the commotion, remained calm. "Listen, before I tell you everything, you have to remember that Jutsu brought me _back to life_."

"Just tell us!"

Gaara closed his eyes. "I became the way I am now about a week after you all started off towards Konoha. The thing that happened a moment ago is common. My body isn't as tough as it was, but I can't be killed like a normal person."

"So wait," interrupted Naruto, "you're immortal?"

"No, there is no such thing."

" Shikimaru fought two guys from the Akatsuki who were immortal."

"And where are they now?"

"Dead……"

"Exactly."

"But you said you couldn't be killed like a normal person."

"_Normal_ person."

"Alright, so what was the tweak?"

"The Life Transfer Jutsu was created by a younger person. I can't exactly word this with without being rude, but it doesn't work with old people. This," he motioned to himself, "is the result."

Naruto went into butt-kisser mode. "You really don't look that bad for something that's half dead!"

Everyone sweat dropped.

"Gee, thanks Naruto," Gaara muttered, "for calling me half dead."

"Wait, you're not a zombie?"

"No, I am."

"Well which is it? Yes or no?"

"Yes, but I wouldn't call myself a zombie."

"But you are one?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. You are a zombie."

**********

After three days had passed, it was time to leave.

Kankuro, Gaara and Temari had led them to the gate and were now waving goodbye.

Sakura waved back, "Bye! Thanks for letting us stay!"

"No problem," called Temari, "we could use an extra girl around here more often!"

Naruto waved to Gaara. "Next time you see me, I'll be closer to becoming Hokage!"

"Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!"

**********

Soon, Suna was out of sight.

Team Seven trudged through the desert alone.

Sakura and Kakashi were being quiet because they were set on getting out of the desert before dark- to avoid getting lost. Naruto shared the same goal, only his was a little bit different. Instead, he was set on getting out of the desert so they would get back home as soon as possible.

He couldn't wait to get back to Konoha and tell everyone that he was friends with a zombie.

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**Earlier today I was looking at artwork online and I saw several pictures of zombified Gaara's, I thought "You know, Gaara would make a great zombie" and a fic was born.**

**To be honest, I think this is probibly one of my greatest works (Grammar wise).**

**Reviews are as loved as life.**


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